“Never discuss politics or religion in polite company,” we’re told. Today, following that rule of polite society is particularly difficult when divisive partisan politics seems like a religion to so many on both sides of the political aside.
I should know: I live in Washington, D.C.
I have worked for decades in American politics in advocacy, on presidential campaigns, serving on U.S. Senate staff, and as a Trump appointee at the U.S. Department of State.
While President-elect Donald Trump won the biggest popular vote victory by any non-incumbent Republican since 1988, our political conversations seem as contentious as ever. It’s hard to know what issues are safe to discuss with our friends, and seemingly impossible with strangers.
But between the U.S. Capitol and the White House is a cigar bar where the unthinkable happens on a daily basis: People from both political parties get together, and they get along. A political oasis, you will see members of Congress, staffers from the House and Senate, reporters, advisors, and consultants all sitting together, talking, laughing, and smiling.
It may sound odd, but sometimes the best way to clear the air is over a good cigar.
Getting men and women together to talk and unwind with a cigar may not seem like a big deal, but in Washington, like America, too often people only work and play with other like-minded people. Cigars offer the chance to change all of that.
Far off from the floor of the Senate, or the remarks from a committee room, a cigar bar gives political players a place where they can talk – and listen, too. All off the record, while the smoke blows, tempers do not. As the ashes fall, so do the partisan tensions.
It’s not uncommon to see the same people who were yelling at each other on cable news in the morning sitting together and laughing over a robusto or double corona that afternoon.
After a few cigars, you may quietly hear folks say things like “Hey, that’s a good point” or “I never thought of it that way.” As you get closer to closing time, you may even the rarest line spoken in Washington, D.C.: “I agree.”
It makes sense when you think about it. Excessive alcohol can lead people to become overly emotional or say things to provoke or react in ways that are less than helpful. This does not happen with cigars. Smoking a cigar is a highly contemplative experience. It is thought provoking. And when you have people with different perspectives, cigar smoking can be a disarming experience that allows for people to have reasonable and rational discussions across politics, culture and life experiences.
This experience is not unique to our nation’s capital.
This happens across America every day at cigar shops and lounges, too. It’s not uncommon to find a financial advisor and an over-the-road trucker talking about Tuesday’s election, or Sunday’s big game. Want to listen in as a retiree and a Gen Z share their divergent perspectives on current events? Stop by your local cigar bar.
Like wine, taste and preferences in a wide variety of handmade cigars can differ just as the clientele does too, note that some of the fastest growing groups of cigar smokers are women and Black Americans. Nowhere else in this country can you find such different groups of Americans coming together for the same engaging experience, and exchanging ideas and thoughts, all in a respective way.
As the holidays approach, some are worried about the impact of politics at their Thanksgiving table, and perhaps rightfully so. I would like to make a suggestion:
Bring cigars.
Yes, there will be some people who would never smoke a cigar under any circumstances. But you may also be surprised by friends and family who take you up on the offer to sit, to relax, to share. Who knows – they may even surprise themselves.
This is a great country with great diverse people and perspectives, and whatever great divide exists in society and politics, can be repaired.
All we are saying is give cigars a chance.
